Sex Therapy 101

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Let's start with why you may need a sex therapist and what to expect in sex therapy, and what sex therapists can accomplish in your life. It is important to understand that we as human beings don't exist in a unilateral world. We are almost always in relationship with one or another persons. Whether it be work or personal life, there is a systemic flow to who you are and how you interact in the world around you. In your relationship the issues of sex, intimacy, love, career, health and life in general all add up to who you and your mate are, together, as one entity.

As sex therapists, it is often important to break down these individual issues and isolate the actual sexual issues from the relationship factors. Although if is often difficult to separate the two, that's exactly what your sex therapist tries to do. In better understanding sequences of behavior and patterns of interaction in your relationship, therapy helps you to gain clarity on who you are and what you expect from your partner. Your relationship and sex life are not independent of one another.

Fixing a relationship doesn't necessarily mean the sex life automatically becomes healthy, though it can at times. There is a method behind the madness of therapy and sex therapy. We do not perform magic, though at times it can seem so. It is work, and hard work on everyone's part. The original therapeutic models for sex therapy go back more than three decades to the pioneering sexologists.

We run into a myriad of issues. Some of them include, but are not limited to premature ejaculation, erectile disorder, performance anxiety, orgasms dysfunctions, low libido, and hundreds or other such complaints that often seem not fixable to the couple who enter our office with them, when often they are. Many feel they have "fallen out of love". Sometimes that is the case, and sometimes they simply do not have the tools with which to work yet.

No day is the same for a clinical sexologist. Many handle a variety of problems that may not seem so mainstream. Some specialize in alternative lifestyles. If you cannot find one who is right for you, ask your medical doctor for a referral.

Sexologists have devoted much time and research in order to gain an understanding of human sexuality and human behaviors. The training and coursework is very specific to sexuality issues. In choosing a therapist of your choice, make sure that the clinician you choose, has received both a proper education, as well as clinical supervision from a university that offers a state qualified human sexuality graduate program.

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